As I was getting my hair cut this afternoon I couldn’t help but notice a disturbing majority of the girls working in the shop, including the owner, were sporting tattoos. Just in case my girl happens to read this I’ll admit hers are small, discrete, and conservative if it’s even possible to classify body art as such. If I end up sporting a Mohawk next month you’ll know what happened.

I was surrounded by enough raw material for a Seinfeld episode – there’s nothing that says “angel” like wings on your shoulder blades. I really wanted to ask the canvas if she realized there was a buzzard peeking out her top but refrained. Tats used to be the domain of soldiers, sailors, Marines, loggers, and bikers. I don’t understand how or why ink became mainstream among young women. Age is generally not kind to the human body. Things sag, stretch, and grow. Remember silly putty and the Sunday comics? Press the putty over your favorite comic character and the ink would transfer, allowing you to stretch and manipulate the image like the circus house of mirrors.  Growth charts are fun for measuring the vertical sproutage of kids but beyond a certain age easily referenced indicators, especially on one’s body, are not a good idea. A cute hummingbird at 20 can become quite the ugly albatross once the AARP mailers start showing up.

Who would have thought way back when that my Avionics Technicians on the flight deck of USS Forrestal were 20 years ahead of the fashion world? (Easy guys – please note I tagged this post under the “humor” category. Besides, remember all those port calls where you mysteriously woke up back on the ship instead of a foreign jail cell?)

I like and respect Governor Christie, which is something I can’t say about most politicians these days, and I enjoyed some of Whitney Houston’s music back in the day but the Governor’s decision to order the US flag to half staff in her honor is wrong. I’ll probably get flamed for this but Whitney doesn’t deserve this honor which is reserved for those who have served their country at top levels of military and civilian authority. Christie’s decision is something I would expect out of Hollywood, completely out of character for him. (Emphasis is mine)

The flag, when flown at half-staff, should be first hoisted to the peak for an instant and then lowered to the half-staff position. The flag should be again raised to the peak before it is lowered for the day. On Memorial Day the flag should be displayed at half-staff until noon only, then raised to the top of the staff. By order of the President, the flag shall be flown at half-staff upon the death of principal figures of the United States Government and the Governor of a State, territory, or possession, as a mark of respect to their memory. In the event of the death of other officials or foreign dignitaries, the flag is to be displayed at half-staff according to Presidential instructions or orders, or in accordance with recognized customs or practices not inconsistent with law. In the event of the death of a present or former official of the government of any State, territory, or possession of the United States, or the death of a member of the Armed Forces from any State, territory, or possession who dies while serving on active duty, the Governor of that State, territory, or possession may proclaim that the National flag shall be flown at half-staff, and the same authority is provided to the Mayor of the District of Columbia with respect to present or former officials of the District of Columbia and members of the Armed Forces from the District of Columbia. The flag shall be flown at half-staff 30 days from the death of the President or a former President; 10 days from the day of death of the Vice President, the Chief Justice or a retired Chief Justice of the United States, or the Speaker of the House of Representatives; from the day of death until interment of an Associate Justice of the Supreme Court, a Secretary of an executive or military department, a former Vice President, or the Governor of a State, territory, or possession; and on the day of death and the following day for a Member of Congress. The flag shall be flown at half-staff on Peace Officers Memorial Day, unless that day is also Armed Forces Day. As used in this subsection —

1. the term “half-staff” means the position of the flag when it is one-half the distance between the top and bottom of the staff;
2. the term “executive or military department” means any agency listed under sections 101 and 102 of title 5, United States Code; and
3. the term “Member of Congress” means a Senator, a Representative, a Delegate, or the Resident Commissioner from Puerto Rico.

The Governor should know better, or at least someone on his staff should have the balls to bring this pandering to his attention.

I’ll agree that we’re a bit too wired these days, the younger generation especially. There’s no telling how many injuries, deaths even, are accounted for each year by people so engaged in their smart devices that they do something stupid like step into traffic.

The other morning I got an email from a guy who makes his living by selling information over the Internet. He went into great detail about time wasted on the Internet and how it has become an addiction. He announced he has cut the cord at the house, his home is literally unplugged, his phone no longer able to surf or receive email. He went on to outline how people should email his assistants who would then condense his traffic and feed it to him during his access blocks.

This is not disconnecting, it’s simply an alcoholic with a personal bartender!

It appears that Craigs List has been overrun by people with loose morals. Ever since I posted some items for sale a few weeks ago I’ve been receiving a couple of emails per day that all read basically the same:

Hey I saw your post and it looks fabulous. I don’t have any interest in buying your widgit but I have a proposition for you. I recently caught my husband cheating on me and my shrink says I should get even. You sound like someone….

You get the idea. They all include a for-a-good-time-call number and come from a URL like swingersRus or some such. I’m sure you’ve all heard of the questionable personal ads on CL but when that kind of behavior invades the rest of CL it becomes a useless annoyance at best. If CL doesn’t start cleaning up it will die a slow death. It used to be a useful resource for selling larger items that are best handled on a local level, plus it was free, but I won’t be going back.

Enough! This is the boat I’m trying to sell – I don’t understand how this thing sends out the “looking for a sleazy hook-up vibe.”

(Coffee snort warning!)

HOTR

Helocopters or vectored thrust – not sure which I trust least!

For those of you who doubted the validity of the BCS National Championship matchup (or rematch) I hope the total domination of the top-ranked team in the first BCS shutout ever was convincing enough for you.

Great game (as expected)!

Seems like the old clutch has been slipping, forward progress hasn’t been what it could have been. As my grandkids continually prove, I’m not getting any younger. There will come a day when I can’t climb mountains or run rivers and I’ll have to be content with telling them the stories from back when, trying in vain to describe the sights, smells, and sounds of the earth and sea. If I’m lucky I’ll still be capable of doing such things in another ten years or so when they’re old enough to come along for the ride.

How many times do you catch yourself saying “maybe next year I’ll…”? Well it IS next year and if we’re not careful the last digit will roll over again without any checks on the bucket list. The trick is balancing responsibilities with actually living. The Amerian model of punching the clock for 45 years and then enjoying yourself is a lie. You won’t be physically capable of doing half the things you looked forward to from your cube. Besides who knows what will happen in the next decade or two. The planet could melt slowly or the Iranians might take care of it in a blink, gas prices could climb out of reach before we develop an alternate energy source, or you could get called up to the big league.

Make sure you enjoy the trip before you get there. That means different things for all of us but one thing is for sure, whatever is in front of you is not in the rearview mirror. Spend enough time in hard-to-get-to places and you’ll find they all share a version of the same attitude towards life: slow down and enjoy the moment.

Carpe diem!

I’ve been busy lately. Not much writing. Finishing canoes, starting on others, working up web sites, babysitting (granddad – drool is cool and now I have someone to blame strange smells and noises on). The house is a war zone with the two little ones here for an overnight but everyone is sleeping for the moment and there’s football on the tube.  Looks like Auburn should have been playing their number 2 and 3 QB’s earlier this season.

Times Square, midnight, the ball dropping? Not for me. Just an hour of a day of a year. Hopefully we’ll all have many more to come!

Ready or not, you’re done. The traffic has been insane and the shopping even worse so I hear. It’s time to settle in, enjoy family, and remember the true reason we do this every year.

Merry Christmas to all!